Mar 14, 2016 ยท 1 minute


You were a journalist in March 2016, right?

Why yes honey, I was.

The month when a fascist was whipping up racist crowds to assault black protesters at his rallies, and then promising to pay the storm troopers’ legal bills?

That’s right, sweetie.

And when on the other side, a communist and a DC insider under investigation by the FBI were competing for the Democratic nomination. And, if elected, they would have been either the first Jewish or first female president.

My oh my, those were historic days.

And… I think I’m right… wasn’t March 2016 also when North Korea was readying its nuclear missiles and al Qaeda murdered 16 people in an Ivory Coast hotel and ISIS started using chemical weapons?

You you sure know your history, dumpling. But I was a tech reporter, not a politics reporter. Those things weren’t really my beat.

Well, wasn’t that the same month Apple was fighting with the FBI over our Fourth Amendment rights? And about the same time Russian Oligarchs were snapping up chunks of American tech companies? And the entire tech industry was staring down a "techpocolypse"? Just as sharing economy companies were facing their first serious threat of unionisation and increased employment regulation. 

And wasn’t it also the month a promenent venture capitalist was embroiled in a sex scandal, and Gawker was fighting for its life in court in a battle that still today is cited as precedent for when it’s in the public interest to publish private sex tapes? When AJ Daulerio said he’d draw the line at four year olds, and admitted he'd refused to take down a tape of a young girl reportedly being raped.  

That's right. And now Gawker is owned by the Daily Mail, sweetheart. 

So, where were you in March 2016, graddaddy?

Uh... Well...


I was at South By Southwest.